bouquet of love #37

there is soo much that comes to my mind,
these mixed feelings and its presence all the time
the restlessness that leaves me numb,
the fear that takes away all my senses,
the thoughts that dont allow me to be in the present
the constant thrive to survive and get somewhere,
the absolute that I feel every moment,
the thirst to solve the mystery of my life
the constant try to provide momentum to life..
to achieve, to accomplish and to witness
the taste of life that is in my mind

Ah!! its all but passion and faith and strength,
to be at peace with myself and rest in content...

bouquet of love #36

Note: Dedicated to Janoo, Payal and Mansee.... ;)

Those discussions over a cup of chaai @kitli
Those drives till eternity that took nowhere
Music and gossips.. all desperate ears to that
Meaningless debates over topics no personal at all
Brooding over lil things and fantasies
Caffeine intake that kept us going through the night
Being @work till dawn and yet appearing @clients with a smile
Verbal vomit that invariably came out almost all the time
Hogging food like hungry dogs
Plunging into sea of emotions depicting every event that occurred
Oath of giving the fullest of us to everyone close to us..
Crying till tears dried in the eyes itself
Expressing each feeling with utmost expressions available...

There is sooo much life in each passing moment
but much more life in the past memories...
Missing life and being alive!

bouquet of love #35

Unexpectedly you came into my life
Finding love I walk to you
Then you talk and think to make me your wife
To begin afresh a beginning new..

The smell of our bodies infuse
With your passionate touch of care
How much I love to see your tattoos
So many speechless moments we share..

Dim lit room by the end of the hall
Dancing shadows and sensual forms on the wall
Heart beating restlessness flourishing with time
Converting the moment into a passionate rhyme..

Hundreds of candles with luminescent glow
Trying to replicate the moon below
Cries of love and fulfilling desire
Kindle within with subsiding fire..

With you I feel eternity a step away
Lost with you I want to be forever
We continue to grow with each passing day
I wish we stay like this in all our endeavors...

A song close to my heart...

I've been waiting for a girl
like you, to come my way.
And I've been waiting for a
girl like you to shine some
light on my days.
And I've been searching for
that someone, who can
understand me,
someone who's not afraid to laugh
or cry, and share that with me.
I've been waiting for
a boy like you,
to hold my hand.
And I've been waiting
for a boy like
you, to give me a chance.
And I've been longing
for that feeling,
of being complete.
You have show me just
how  love is
when two minds meet.
I know, I know, I know
We can make it if we try,
we can make it you and I.
We can...
We can make it if we try
We can..
A love like our's can't be denied
We can make it if we try,
we believe in you and I.
We can...
We can make it if we try,
We can...
A love like our's can't be denied.
Could you be the kind to love,
unconditionally.
Could you be the kind to overlook
the faults in me.
We don't have to last forever just
for the rest of our lifetime.
If you're feeling what i'm feeling,
Then this is the right time.
Well I guess that it was worth the
waiting, coz now you see, what do
you mean to me.
Well this time there'll be no
hesitating.
If I was blind, I'll still see
you as mine...oh oh...oh baby
Yeah...coz i know,
I know that we can make it...
Yeah, oh...!

I know, I know, I know

We can make it if we try,
we can make it you and I.
We can...
We can make it if we try
We can..
A love like our's can't be denied

We can make it if we try,
we believe in you and I.
We can...
We can make it if we try,
We can...

bouquet of love #34

the night is shattered and the stars fumble in the sky,
the wind blows in the sky and roars..
tonight i can write the saddest lines:
nights like this i had you in my arms
i kissed you and hugged you under this very sky,
the dim light and the twinkles up high witnessed our unison.

tonight i can write the saddest lines:
i loved you. and sometimes you loved me too!
it was divine and serene, all that filled our hearts.
but i have lost you now, and you are no more mine.
there to take me in your warmth and protect me till death.

tonight i can write the saddest lines:
this thought of not having you now,
this insecurity taking over my every cell,
i hear this night turning more immense,
even more immense and darker without you.

tonight i can write the saddest lines:
this void is like the darkness beyond
the stars and the moon and the planets
all forgone and by passed,
this silence that pinches like a needle.

tonight i can write the saddest lines:
my voice tries to reach you with the blowing winds
my sight searches to take a glance at your face
as though through darkness it could note all the minute details
my heart thumps everytime i feel you approaching nearer.

tonight i can write the saddest lines:
you will no more be a part of me,
but will be another's..
all my memories and moments
would be washed away and taken over.

tonight i can just go on and on..
putting down my anger and frustration,
more than anything else, expressing my failure,
you are gone and life has come to a still
my soul is suffocating and my life lost & shattered..
incomplete and unsatisfied, i look at this shattered sky
tonight i make friends with it and share my mind!

bouquet of love #33

tie your heart at night to mine, love..
these feelings keep piling up,
not often as we talk though
curling up our lips
while the walls watch it through..
let our dreams speak for us
as dreams are pictorial and innocent,
i confess this during another night
of sleeping next to you
flashing the thoughts and desires

yearned for entire life..

sleep on while i'm talking

side by side, leg on leg

the warmth of you is an ecstacy

you are not me and i am never you

except those hours

when we sleep in our arms

lost in our own dreams that rests us together...

bouquet of love #32

when a woman loves a man...

when she snaps and says 'leave me alone'
you are the one who could hold her in her disconsolate state..
when she says she loves you
her world begins with you and her day ends looking at your sleeping face..
when a woman loves a man
she wants him to witness her every breath..
when she loves, she is like a child
crying and wanting for expressions to show..
when she sleeps in the night
she is like a candle whom you don't want to blow off in the dark..
when a woman loves a man
she accepts all his pain even before it comes..
when she is on the phone
she wants you to be there to hear every word she thinks and speaks..
when she gazes at the sky
YOU are the only one in her mind!

bouquet of love #31

when you grow old and grey,
when life seems to come to halt
when you sit by the fire in the house
open this book and read these lines..

how love fled away once
and hid among the mountains
amongst the crowd..

how once were you loved by many,
their love either true or false
but yet so much of your beauty
that it covered the viewers' eyes mesmerized!

there was only one among all those
who loved the pilgrim soul within you
and yearned to be the alchemist
to find the dream of the soft love..
and pace to the depth of your eyes
and turn your dream into real..

love's philosophy

No. love is not just once..
it so happens that it strikes again & again
and makes you give even more.
love is just not once,
it lets you grow and feel
the peace and contentment and happiness
the rainbow colors it show..
it itself grows like a rainbow,
7 times in a row..

who says life is just once,
life is even after death..
where soul tries to linger
through the unsolved, incomplete tasks..
to solve the unturned mysteries
and to tackle the unattended..

the wheel of love and life
go inseparable, immortal, infinte..

bouquet of love #30

somewhere i have never travelled beyond..
gladly did i know i never really needed
my every encounter with your eyes
landed me in one world of its own
where we stroll together
by the side of the road..

your slightest gesture encloses me
within you and closed that i am like a flower
you unclose me petal by petal
your glance opens and closes me
everytime you take me in your arms
around the world i travel
feeling a princess beside the knight..
if you wish to be close to me
my life will open and shut with you..
you only do i need..
and you only do i see..

bouquet of love #29

i m here on my own
living in hindsight
knowing you yet as a stranger,
a loner and as a wanderer
perhaps not to be is without your being..
distance hurts indeed..
clenched soul as mine needs liberation
from the bounds and knots
from the suffocating living
and someone to come hither
hold hand and pull up,
towards twilight,
towards the mountain top,
towards the flowing river,
towards the green woods,
towards the waterfalls,
towards the valleys and wilds,
towards the divine sky,
towards wherever there exists
a mere presence of love
and blossoming life..
where sun rises,
where everything appears equal,
where life begins,
where nature sings,
where flowers bloom,
where birds fly
and where perhaps you be...

bouquet of love #28

i was once a lost discoverer,
driven in madness, i was a luckless clinger,
a blind traveller and a thorough achiever..
but in you everything sank!

light, love and a shadow..
is what i expected you to be
and i plunged onto this bed of roses
the moment you appeared before me..

restless and overwhelmed
i had soo much in store to give,
to dedicate, to dictate and to designate
and it just came to you all together..

you still blossom the deserts,
grill the currents,
flee through my thoughts
and run in my plasma..
in you everything sank!

our leaf will now fall on the ground
from the tree of our love
as if it is born through the kiss of serenity
towards glory and eternity it leads
and explain its color to the world beneath..
in you everything sank!

bouquet of love #27

its so much pain
within my heart
churned out and exhausted
insecurity taking over
and i stand alone
furious and burning
into a phoenix i m turning
my knees go weak
and my heart thumps..
i need assurance and faith
in the life of our relationship
let me be me for a while
and breath peace..
don't go away
so that to let the compassion be
letting the passion survive
and be free and dive
into the pool of emotions
and enjoy the crests and turfs
of a toggling life and
an unconventional journey..

bouquet of love #26

i held a glass high up in my hand for an hour.. nothing happened

i held a glass high up in my hand for 5 hours.. a lil pain i felt

i held a glass high up in my hand for 10 hours.. my back ached

i held a glass high up in my hand for 20 hours.. my body went stiff!

that glass was nothing but the worries and fear i hold back in life i realised..

i ve put it down to feel lighter and better.. no worries and no fear, my resolution.

today i sleep putting that glass off my hand and head too,

its good to feel You close to me,
in your invisible form you come intently,
my heart withdrawn, sails through your dreams,
twisted nets of worries i detangle here,
no form, no color, no place.. nothing perfect or clear
but my clenched soul hither rests..

rising, you take me to the sky at twilight
and make me gaze through clouds..
love rests for a while before taking off,
finding the frontiers lost in the night..
the light of dawn brings alive
your dream resting in my dreams..

as we return to the light of life,
you drop me back in me
out i pop from the bed
wondering of the serenity and divinity felt in sleep..
dream was it or a trans?
jus a smile remains on my face...

bouquet of love #25

here i love you
in my world, on my own..
days, all one kind, pass as ever
and i watch the winds detangling in tree branches..
identity crisis is what i face,
my life grows, with no purpose at all..
thoughts unfurl as ice melts
but i do not come to terms yet
as love battles,
i will finish off taking the path
by letting me die, and granting you a new life
a life that is full of you.
i shall die to make your way and
thou shall feel eternal love forever...

A night-thought & an after-thought..

A night thought...
where the moon sails in the sky
among the stars and its destiny
she hides beneath the clouds
how dimly does she appear
but when the clouds run away
how bright does she shine..

she glides still in her fairy way
and down there we are the forward race
looking at her hide and seek
we see what was, what is and will always be..
she'll glide forever as she has always been
and play her game with the wise..

An after-thought..
a forward race though we be,
we the brave, the mighty and the wise..
the forms will die but never the spirits
to live, to act and to serve
we appear, we vanish, we chase the silent tomb
and there we go towards the sullen sky
the moon, the stars and the clouds that abide..
through love, through hope, through life
taking up an impulsive consent
and there we glide..
follow her, now, the partner, the guide...

bouquet of love #24

as i write it for us
i write it with a flair
this feeling so much felt and
these words so unbound..

i write it as you were,
the innocent smile on your face
the shyness in your eyes
the coy in your every look..
ah.. it indeed killed!

ur arms felt like a growing plant
creeping over my body..
your voice, the green leaves that garnered love
your touch, the growth - slow and peaceful
your passion, the blue flowers it blossomed..

seasons changing and years passing by
i still feel your the warmth in winter
the care and sooth in summer
rains are always romantic in your memories
and autumn... the hope of a new life!!

bouquet of love #23

as it always happens,
we part,
nonetheless...
we cross again,
we look and dwell..
its been ages,
we dreamt and realized..
its sharing time and moments
we relive the dreams
those ones in the enchanted world
dreams as illusive as you..
time STOPS,
so do we..
yet again..
that thunder in your voice,
your mesmerizing eyes talking love,
tenderness in your touch,
warmth in your presence,
and smile on your face...
the magnetic aura of our togetherness,
the dynamism it endures within..
felt and relived for seconds..
as it has to vanish again
as in the past..
yet again to part..
i wonder..
about the parting gesture..
a hand shake, or a simple wave,
or a hug and a peck on my cheek..
a bare hug it happened..
your fragrance merged within me
and i take it all with me
as a treasure..
as i now know that i have you, a friend,
to let me melt into his arms in need,
and console and comfort..
so i take it all back with me..
till we meet again...

bouquet of love #22

today i m here, running through those millions and zillions of thoughts that come to my mind and leave its impression on me..

when i sit to pen down some of those, i end up writing on 'wildness';

one that you taught me by appearing in my life, teaching me things that otherwise i would have never learnt or experienced..

your mere presence into my life has made me learn to smell the withered roses, talk to the moonlit night, taste the wet earth, seeing the sunset and walk by the bay..

wildness is when i understood love and when i gauge its depth and existence till eternity..

while writing on 'wildness' i come across a thousands of reasons why i am so much bound..

the turbulent drunkenness i feel when i think of you, and every memory wherein i am with you..

the stroke of passion that captures my mind, my body and my soul when you are around,

it feels like a thunder wave strikes the thirsty, uneven rocks but returns without quenching their thirst, their need..

it comes from hunger that this wildness grows within me every moment, every breath i take, its gasps your name..

indeed it shall be the end of my world..

as when there was ruins and misery, you were a miracle,

when there was terrible desire, you were a calm composer,

when there was despair and blues, you were a hope,

when there was need, you were a support,

when there were dreams, you were a painter,

when there was love.. you were the realizer..

bouquet of love #21

as i stand with my bags packed

waiting for the taxi to come,

i drift into the ramblings i have

feel the eternity of distance approaching between us..

every breeze brings with it 

a whiff of you, unforgettable and inachievable

its difficult to let go of, and say good bye

to all the unsaid and spoken and all the felt and left over..

as i break into tears, each tear reminds me 

of moments we had together

of the fights, laughter and joy we felt

of the rains and the movies and the coffees..

when we agreed to disagree on everything

rose in me the gratitude and sea of emotions

for not letting ME be

killing our dreams and castles woven in the heart..

its difficult to say goodbye

when you don't know whether its even gonna happen again

to come to US and let it be

falling head over heels in love all over again..

with each other, for each other, together forever!

words/moments i take back..

now that i m bidding adieu not forever but for not showing them my bright smiling face everyday either at work or at 'home', i shall hereby quote the customized things/lines/words about people who have been quintessential in making my life a rockstar life whom i will never forget...

Janavi Iyer - 'Meeroooo..', 'disgusting', 'uhhhh!', 'miss you', 'oh f**k', 'princess' and the list will go on and on and on and on... <3 love u girl!! all your attitude and people handling skills shall be remembered boss!

Payal Basotia - 'wo mein bhool gayi', 'ha toh phir', 'chudail', 'shooni'... and your anger ofcourse... sweet nautanki you are! :)

Mohit Taneja - your simplicity and surrenders.. he he..

Karan - your expertise in movies and music.. awesome you are!!

Sanjeev Ratan Singh - paapu...!! how can i forget the masala chaai at the kitlis and drives.. your perception to look at situations and your bindaas attitude...

Viraj - you are one person from whom i have leart 'sleeping'.. those chats in the middle of the night, studies during the exams and so much more..

Megha - i will always miss the desi-comments that we pass at every point, 'paadi.. faati jais!', also the tel champi i will miss the most...

Aboli - KK... i will miss your late tubelight forever...! your sense of humor and love.. serene and divine..

Anirvan - dada... Rockstar you are and you treat us all the same way. i will always remember the way you motivate me and the fun and magic we seek in every element in life..

Pallavi - your hospitality, your warmth, parties at your place, your loving nature... and gossips! :)

Lajja - 'hay hay chhokri!'.. hoon tane bahu j miss karish. tari vato and tari sathe ni yado har hamesh mara hriday ma taaji rehshe.. ane ha tara taiyar thavana ane khavana sokh ne thodi bhuli shaku? hows this??

Milin - without your teachings i wouldn't have been able to pass with flying colors. u were an ideal student and had always been a sincere friend..

Janaki -TT khelne chale?? cheating!! its allowed with me not with u!... party with u guys and gettlin sloshed was the greatest thing... dancing with you in all style and latka-jhatka and all... OMG! m gonna miss you girl...

Rumi - 'what the hell yaar!'.. i can't take this anymore.. i am going now.. i wanna go for a holiday.. he he.. rumi, u are one girl who will never take chhuttis and crib about it all the time.. the time spend at ur place and on the terrace was one of the best times in my life.. you commitment is one thing i take forward in life..

Sunil - 'Suniley' ab mujhe 'Meerey' kaun bulayega?? :( you are one gem of a person who just can't get over telling stories about childhood, your number of girlfriends and your boldness.. i think you are the worst match-maker on this earth.. now how will u tease 'heera', 'gajhni', 'khemraaj' and all?? do find someone better for me now..

Siddhant - your sincerity in listening (only) is the greatest thing.. man! i just can't have even 50% of patience as you have. 'tension mat lo ho jayega'.. i think i will need someone to come and speak this one line to me for like 50 times in a day.. even then nobody would be able to match you.. i bet! ;-)

Percy - parties and food are two things where we've had a 50-50 partnership. and i love both equally.. laughter, running around in the office, food, everything is gonna be remembered...

Mihir - 'e sorrrrrra! moza maa?' ha ha.. mihir you will always be remembered in my thoughts for the pathetic PJs and your intellect and interest in technical topics is the thing that impresses me everytime i talk to you or discuss something with you. you should have been an engineer man!

Mansi - 'F**k u!'.. ur favorite word right?? how can i just forget all the drama scenes that happened in the middle of the night? courtesy Ms. Mansi Thakkar! :) you are too young to get on the right path in life and even if it IS the right path, you are young to handle and walk straight on the path.. girl your bindaas nature and care-free attitude is worth implementing in life.. miss u!!! :) xx

i hope you all liked it!

random ramblings...

i was just thinking of writing something and how can there be any better topic then my stay in Ahmedabad for 3 years??!! its been a wonderful experience sharing life and love and a lot more with the extended family that we have formed here. 

those late night coffees, pop-corns, movies till dawn, midnight drives, coffee-shops at wee hours, pillow fights, meaningless laughs to glory, emotional atyachaar, cries out-of-no-reason, fights for ego, gossips, adventures against strangers, masala chaai, kitlis, novels and books, surprise parties, gifts, flowers bouquets, working till like 6 in the morning, cribbing about the bosses, and just all of it!

today when i m movin toward 'home' towards 'family', i am overwhelmed and emotional to see everything flowing right in front of my eyes.. away from me! i know these days are never gonna come back and these moment are the ones i shall cherish till eternity. i shall sit lonely at the window pondering inside, looking at the dark sky thinking of all of it. am i making the right move? can anybody just come and hold my hand and show me the right path which leads me to destiny? was it enough to achieve all that i have in these 3 yrs? did i miss saying 'sorry' to a friend? did i missed the love-of-my-life? did i forgot to listen to a well-wisher? did i not make the FULL use of these years i was given? 

m sure there would be things i would be missing onto but at the same time i m sure there are people whose lives i have touched and made a difference. there are people whom i've made smile. there are places where i have filled colors of happiness, there are moments where i have filled emotions, there are days when i have cried my heart out, there are moments where i have been strong enough to face the storm racing in my life. i have had all of it and i have grown out of all of it. i am sure i have done all of it.. 

but today i have these hundreds of random thoughts that are running through my mind and making my heart thump at the very thought of my new life. 

i have my extended family here, my friends, who are all gonna be with me when i finally step towards the new chapter of my life and leave my dreams to pursue new dreams..

this is an ode to all my friends, specifically to Janavi, Payal, Pratik, Mohit, Karan, Viraj, Megha, Rupa, Aboli, Nupur, Anirvan, Pallavi, Mansi, Lajja, Milin, Janaki, Rumi, Sunil, Shreshth, Percy, Siddhant, and all whom i have'nt named in the list. thanks for just being there for me at various points in life. ur presence has made my life worthwhile and have let me grow as a person. you are all my family and i will always remember you!

love you all....

hope in the inbox..

Everyday i start my desktop/lappi with a hope, a hope to open my inbox and find a new mail.. i dont know what is it that i am seeking in there but i have this anxiety to look for something in the inbox. rather a mail that would provide me some clue to my so-called direction-less life, a mail that would add meaning to my current life, a mail that would be a surprise and would come as a life changer.. a mail that would add a new dimension to life and change the meaning of my existence.

every damn day there is a hope in me that emerges since the time i open my eyes and every damn night i sleep with a hope that tomorrow will bring with it the change in my life...  hope, hope, and only hope...

complexity of relationships... uh.. aah..oouch!

“After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, and you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t mean security, and you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts and presents aren’t promises, and you begin to accept you defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult and the grief of a child, and you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure… that you really are strong, and you really do have worth.” 

~Veronica A. Shoffstall

Came across these beautiful lines while reading something on the internet and it just cut across my mind.. this is exactly what I understand of life ever since i have tagged myself as a grown up (that was not a long time ago though ;-) ) so i decided to share these bunch of lines with all of you here and show another side of me as a person.

women and her various roles go hand-in-hand. there is always an instinct of simplest of relationships, friendship, if not anything else.. be it any kind of woman categorically one who is solely practical, implementing and calculative or be it a thorough Bollywood kinds, awestruck with the fantasy of a wonderland called love, emotional and irrational. Of all the different categories of women these are the two extremes possible and even there you find a relationship angle. a relationship in the form of a friend, a lover, a spouse, a colleague, a sister, a daughter and above all a mother.

everystep in life does she enter into a relationship with a man and everytime she comes out evolved and more loving. women are the mascots of love and would serve to be the same for like forever!

after living in denial for years i have come to terms with the fact that at the end of all of it i AM single. i have shared my part of relationships but over the years i think i have evolved more through learning and observations of the relationships around me. firstly, there is a woman who is doing fantastic in life and then there is this man who enters into her life and makes it a live piece of a dreamworld woven in her head. with each passing day she comes out in a more loving form and takes a step forward to the security and satisfaction. but at the end i stay there rattling my head, stretching my swollen watery eyes wide and cursing the man! its is just so convenient for men to let go off relationships in life keep moving on..

"I have recognized that it doesn't matter if a guy is sexy, funny, smart, charismatic and rich if he doesn't make you feel safe to communicate openly, safe to trust his commitment and loyalty, or safe to be your fullest self. A relationship of shared virtue where each partner challenges and supports the other to bloom into their best possible selves..."

~ Karen Salmansohn

right now i am overwhelmed with a zest of mixed emotions trying to burst out like a volcano so the above line i think says it all.
cheers to life!

bouquet of love #20

the story goes like a fairytale
known by all but felt by a few
it isn't about him and me,
its about a prince and his princess..

there was the princess standing at the window
and there came the prince riding on his white horse
they didn't know each other
neither did they feel each other

their glances just met and they felt the spark
nothing was spoken, nothing conveyed
yet there was life in their eyes
and dreams forayed..

the princess was utterly delicate
elegant, poised and fair
her hair were looong
like a thread to a kite..

the prince was youthful & shy
charming and bold did  he look
his torso was strongly built
with a sword did he appeared a knight..

fragile and soft did the princess looked
her eyes had the quench for her soul mate
the moment they locked their eyes
since then words weren't uttered and their hearts merged to one

seemed like a chapter from a story book
this couple was one from the heaven
horizon was their limit of love
and eternity was their end to life...

Hijacked...

its been ages i went for a loong drive, drooled over the fun and fresh feel of being 'me', sang loudly (though not in   any match to normal singing), and above all just being happy.. :-)

i had such a ball today.. it was a dinner date at Hijack (the new bus restaurant).. see.. now u r keen to know more.. about Hijack or about my dinner date hmmm? m sure about Hijack he he.. i went there with a frn Neha and it was a dinner dedicated to the single women... toast to all singles!

we began our journey with some 35mins of calls from office and client.. it was a horrible start.. there was no mood, no fun, no charm.. we were there coz we had purchased the tickets at 5 in the evening and there was no time to hand over the tickets to someone else.. so out of NO-OPTION we were there, sitting on the table, starting at each other and making no good time.. eventually it so happened that the live guitarist started to play some really nice numbers and also invited anybody who wanted to sing and enjoy..

gradually the mood was set and then we started takin interest in wat was happenin around us.. it was soo beautiful.. being on the road, high above all cars, singing, eating, clapping, shouting and still being care-free...

we sang all the songs from Saiyaan (Kailash Kher) to Yaaron dosti badi hi haseen hai to gulabi aankhein to tum ho to..  it was simply out of the world.. uncles sang for aunties, frns dedicated songs to other frns, there was love in the air..

even the waiters and the manager accompanied us in singing and suggesting songs.. after a 45 km long 1.5 hr long drive we came back to where we started and dropped down to carry on with our own individual lives..but for a moment we all had one life, one time and one motto- to enjoy being Hijacked...! and we all did that.. great efforts done by great people to bring value to small things in life..

cheers to life!!

bouquet of love #19

i've been passing time all my life
looking at lovers holding hands walking past..
i've been wondering how they met
and what makes it last all life..

i've been wanting to enjoy lying down on sand
and watching the waves coming till my feet
i've been yearning to feel that light and
flow with the tide and let go myself..

i've been thinking of it all my life..
as i've been passing time
finding the right face
i've been wondering would i even recognize??

i've been dying to take those long walks
beside the benches on the seashore
planning the dreams to wake
and so much love to make..

i've been dreaming of being with you
at the Opera theatre..
to listen to the stories they narrate
and feel your love growing in me..

i've been making air castles
where i'll be sitting with you in the verandah..
singing songs and lullabies every
full moon night... swinging to the rhythm of life...

bouquet of love #18

As the night passes by

I sit beside the window

And take a glance at the stars

Stars shining the dark night 

I wonder why God created them

These small tiny little sparkles

That twinkle in the dark and

Make a shining existence.. and vanish!

I wonder why they only be there

High up in dark & just nowhere

I yearn to be one of the kinds

To shine and vanish but leave my existence

within the dark background

And finally fall down quite below

But fulfilling someone’s wish at the same time

To be a part of fulfillment and satisfaction

Just setting in the wish for someone's happiness

becoming a sparkle to brighten someone special.. <3

bouquet of love #17

bells ringing... birds singing..
puppets dancing.. water flowing...
life fulfilling... love blooming..

it makes me feel so full
this feeling is one after a looooong time
the one that gives me goose bumps
and tinkles in my body..

it makes me feel so happy
this feeling is one after a looooong time
this one that gives me eternal pleasure
and leaves me blushing all night..

it makes me feel so proud
this feeling is one after a looooong time
this one that gives meaning to life
and leaves me completely satisfied..

it makes me feel so sexy
this feeling is one after a looooong time
this one that makes me feel beautiful
and adds mattes to my existence..

it makes me feel so childish
this feeling is one after a looooong time
the one that is carefree and freewheeling
and it lets me be the child in me..

ohhh.. this feeling so unspoken
and bewitching..
it jus keeps me going and
makes me feel a harum-scarum...

my first crush... is priceless!!

innocent. lost. confused. enthusiastic. adventurous. interesting. mysterious. adorable. caring. fun-loving. lively. talkative. - i comprise of all these adjectives.. the bulb of my mind suddenly starts passing through a high frequency voltage and the ammeter of my power of logic keeps hitting its maximum! my attitude and behavior was just not like that of a normal girl. doing something great and different, studying something BIG and making my own identity was the aspiration that i carried since i understood life..

my world would start smelling great when i saw him, suddenly the wind would blow on my face and i would feel his fragrance captivating my thoughts, my body went numb, and i literally got a mental blockage every time he came in front of me.. it was exciting.. i could feel the blood gushing through my veins, pumping in and out of my heart, missing a beat everytime he took a glance at me.. these biological changes i tell you!! they make you go crazy.. no hunger, no thirst, no sense- just his face in front of my eye and his thoughts running madly in m mind..

it is very important for me to remember all of these cause it was unconventional and unexplainable. the uneasiness in me occupied a larger pie of my mind then anything else at that point of time. the inquisitive me wanted to burst out,break the chains and splurge into the ocean of questions emerging in my mind diving to find any sensible answer. it was a different time and place.. i loved being lost in the thoughts wondering what difference does it create when i think of him.

'pyaasa kuwein ke paas jata hai, kuwaan pyaase ke paas nahi aata'... i was trembling and fumbling trying to figure out the sensex like motion inside me.. the quench of his presence in front of me, his smell in the things he touched, the electrifying current in his words, the captivating expressions on his face, the tenderness in his hands.. ooh! it was all so vague yet so important for me to experience everyday.. - yeah, my first crush! my teacher!

the urge to approach him and just listen to him, making him happy by doing things that he would appreciate, finding new queries and being pro-active in all his classes.. all of this hold a special place in my heart.. somewhere down the memory lane wen i talk a walk through it today, i feel it was very important for me to fall for an elderly person like my teacher, who drove me, my thoughts, my logic and to an extend my interest in studies.. 

this whole experience is just invaluable, it taught me so many things altogether:

• learning to cope up with the storm of emotions growing inside
• taking a new direction in life, adding meaning to life by following him
• valuing expectations and fulfilling some of those
• going out of your way to bring a smile on somebody's face
• converging your thoughts, energy and power at the same point
• holding the center of your world and rotating just around it in a straight circle
• understanding emotions of life and learning new ones every moment

i owe the transformation from my teens to a mature, voluptuous woman to the man i considered my driving force..

cheers to life!!

P.S. the matter in this blog is purely fake and has no connection to anybody dead or alive.. it has been written purely for the entry of Bigadda contest.. 

bouquet of love #16

as i stand in the garden full of flowers and ethereal perfumes
i feel something holding me hard and thn leaving me totally free
on and on it goes and i feel a different ache in my heart, my mind
i try to find the reason to it and realize that its the spring of your presence
that holds me from within and then your absence that leaves me completely free
leaving me numb and letting me forcefully adjust to wat comes my way
but i realize soon that the flowers in the garden blossom through ur caress
the perfume that it enfolds brings your smell embedded within
like the way i clearly remember the touch of your hands,
the motion of your fingers moving in my hair,
the feel of your soft lips over mine,
the shine in your eyes and the sparkle of love in it,
the chase of your desire to win me over,
the constant thrive of your hunger to gain all the eternal pleasure
by imbibing you within me and me within you...
woven together as it never were different...

a small contribution...

here i stand on the verge of entering a new world in a short span and i am completely clueless how i would frame my world, decorate it with love or happiness, find pleasure and satisfaction from simple little things, be more focussed on life and relationships, be more and more of me... the 'me' that is lost in the hush-bush of the happening city overcrowded with superficial people...

i turn back to the time i've spent here in the city- 3 years!! they passed like a time machine.. wen i look back, i try to figure out what i ve become and how have people around me and this place contributed to make me the person i am today.. m disappointed a lil knowing that i've lost the innocence that resided in me when i came to this place, but in a way i'm thankful to many people and this place (Ahmedabad) in particular to treat me the way it did to make me a more mature, more experienced, more learned, more self-focused and more of a person of matter.. i'm able to take out reasons and judgments of 7 things out of 10 happening in front of me..

i am grateful to every small contribution made by any simple lil thing that made me stand in the position i am today..

i wonder how different i am.. i watch the sunset and gaze into my own self thinking wat i ve learnt at the end of the day.. i hear birds chirping and singing and introspect wat melody i bring in people's life around me..i listen to the flowing water and question wat sound i make in the music of life and where should i take the turn and change the flow... i breathe the fresh air and think wat difference do i make by letting people count me in their life..

lonely as i sit on my bed tryin to sleep i think of all these things and simply wonder the presence of nothingness... this nothingness that helps me build into something concrete and brings fulfillment...

life and its pace

Life has become so horrible 
No time to stop, breath and fall
Its just manipulative and feeble
With no answers to anythings at all...


I wonder why we are so endorsed
into this captive and inquisitive side
Where we are never break even or grossed
but still its something which tightly abides..


i remember faint memories of past
which are full of incidents making merry
which now seems to pass too fast
making me feel like a tale fairy..


i want to go back to those moments
and gain the momentum to grab them all
make tight impressions such as monuments 
so to never let it ever fall...

love story- a song close to my heart...

We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes
And the flashback starts
I'm standing there
On a balcony in summer air

See the lights
See the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
And say hello, little did I know

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don't go, and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while

'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
But you were everything to me
I was begging you please don't go and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

Romeo save me, they try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story baby just say yes
Oh oh

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you is fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town, and I said

Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring

And said, marry me Juliet
You'll never have to be alone
I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress
It's a love story baby just say yes

Oh, oh, oh, oh
'Cause we were both young when I first saw you....

bouquet of love #15

its raining finally!!!
it so happens that you await for a particular moment
to be in the moment, enjoy and cherish it
embrace it from the heart
live with it, fell it, be it!!


its raining finally!!
it so happens that you await to be with someone special
to share the moment, to enjoy the happiness,
give meaning to the moment
and memorize it forever!!


its raining finally!!
it so happens that you desperately and eagerly wait
to hold someone's hand and feel the peace
to walk in the rain holding each other
enjoying each drop of the rain as a pearl!!


its raining finally!!
it so happens that you yearn to hold that someone tightly
and vividly catch the thoughts runnin in the mind
to run to catch the butterflies and to enjoy the soothing greenery
to play, to hide, to seek, to find, to laugh.. till eternity!!


its raining finally!! 
and i miss that someone and i miss the rains
i miss the drives and all the green roads
i miss the masala chai and the pakoras
and i miss being me!!!

bouquet of love #14

"Where is love"..I quizzed the sea
"In my sapphire waves it lies" it roared proudly.

"Where is love"..I asked the trees 
"In our sweet berries" they replied merrily

"Where is love"..I questioned the azure
"In my pearly raindrops" it thundered

"Where is love"..I interrogated breeze
"In my gentle stillness" it decreed.

"Where is love"..I inquisitively asked fire
"In my golden flames" it answered me with ire

"Where is love"..I questioned the earth
"Dwells in my children's mirth"..it moved d answer..

"Where is love"..I asked a baby
"In my mother's arms"..he replied naively

"Where is love"..I cross-examined his mother
"In my baby's titter"..looking at her child's face..

"Where is love?" I asked a young girl
She smiled, "In his heart is my world"

"Where is love?" someone asked me!!
Confused I snapped "Love is in whatever I see"

Love is everywhere around me
Love is in the AIR...

Then I questioned myself
"Yet why do I feel so lonely?"

bouquet of love #13

i secretly yearn for you as the night passes by
i m needing you as it drags slowly
i hope you're longing for me too..
someday our winding paths will meet 
and u'll jus b there in front of me
that is when i'll know i've found you
to many it seems insignificant
but to u it matters, its meaningful
i am waitin till that day to meet
to explore the depths of our hearts
and we'll have the eternal memories
worth every tearful moment that we've waited
as this night drags by, we are apart
but yet closer to our moment in the near future..

bouquet of love #12

sometimes at night, when i look at the sky
i start thinking of you and ask myself why?
why do i love you? i think and smile,
because i know the list could run on for miles..


the whisper of you voice, the warmth of you touch
so many little things that make me love you so much..


the way you support me, and help me with my emotions
the way that you care and show me such devotion..


the way that you kiss, fills me with desire
and how you hold me with the warmth of a blazing fire...


the way your eyes shine when you look at me
lost with you forever is what i want to be..


the way that i feel when you are by my side
a sense of completion and overflowing pride..


the dreams that i dream, that all involve you
the possibilities i see and the things we can do..


how you finish the puzzle that lies inside my heart
how that deep in my soul, you are the most important part..


i could go on for days tellin you what i feel
but all you really must know is my love for you is real!

bouquet of love #11

my heart was once a house
with so many rooms with open doors..
i wud rather allow love enter through the doors
change the room completely around and leave it empty
till one day i realized it was too much pain
digesting to the new layout and settling in the same
so i started closing each door one by one
and gradually forgot what love was like
now there is only one room open in my heart
if you are true and loving, there is a place in my heart..
if you have the same urge to love like me,
there is a room in my heart..


we will change the room inside out
and make it look like a palace new,
we shall paint its walls from blue to red
and bring in stuff that makes it shine
we will set out the fire in one corner
together we wud keep out the cold
and create a mood of a candlelight 
and dance to the rhythm of our love..


so there is surely a room in my heart
if u willing to surrender to love by your art..
ur welcome to step into the room
and make it ours through  the bloom...

bouquet of love #10

i'd rather be somewhere alone with you
then thinking whether you'd be feeling the same too..
i haven't seen you, met you, heard you,
touched you, or even felt you...
are you the one? i question myself..
but somehow i feel that you could be the one..
what is going to happen as fate is unknown
but what is known is that i feel for you
i like talking, sharing, dreaming and planning things
with you it makes a lot of sense to me..
i would want to be with you to see you,
meet you, hear you, touch you and feel you..
the vibes that wud rise then will be an indication
of the coming future to me..
sooner than later but later than sooner
its dwindling every moment
but i know that its you who is gonna stay with me
forever being my friend.. my share!

female foetus..

the minds were tensed
but not at all fensed
bodies were filled with excitement
to fulfill the duties and resposibitites was the committment..

after much of pain and tension
came a feeling of relaxation with a happy gesture
how light the moods went is not required to be mentioned
An angel was blessed in the arms of the mother
to see the angel uneasy and curious was the father..

the first glance at the very cute angel
had the power to captivate even a stranger
happiest were the parents to have this first moment
stunning were their eyes and their words had no comments..

right from the very moment were there plans made
about the happy moments of future which were never gonna fade
came along with it was a net knitted with expectations
the whole image came out of their ideas' menifestation..

this is wat the scene was in the hospital room
when a lucky girl was born it surely was a boon
she was welcomed in the world with open arms
it was sure then there was not goin to be any harm..

lucky are those very few
who are not among those who are being thrown
to destroy the female foetus
and continue promoting a male-dominated world...

piya sang milan...

hawaaein rukh badal rahi hai
fizaaon me nasha sa chha raha hai
aapke k aane ka yeh sara badlaav aa raha hai
dil jhoom raha hai aur dhadkane badh rahi hai
thoda sa dar hai to khusi se machal bhi raha hai

apko sarahne k liye nazre bichaye baithe hai hum
badan bhi bijli ki tarah tharthara raha hai
palke pyasi hai aapki ek zhalak dekhne k liye
aur kaanom ko aapki awaaz sunne ki bekaraari hai

aap aye to aisa laga ki duniyan ruk gai
khusi itni mili k kuch hosh na raha
duniya dekhti rahi aur hum aapke ho gaye
phir hosh aya to laga ki koi baat nahi
duniya dekhe to bhi kya sharmana aakhir aap hume lene aye ho..

kaise beete itne saal yaha ye to pata tha
par kaise beet gaye chand lamhe aapke sath ye pata na chala
waqt jiase thm sa gaya ho hamare milan pe aisa laga
ehsaas bas hua ki mile tabhi guzar gaya yeh lamha

aapke intezaar me itna sabra hum ne kiya
ki bas ab zyaada rukne ki humme himmat nahi
bas bahot ho gaya ye dur rehna
ab paas aa ke bana lo hume apna
le chalo hume uss rah par jahan hai aapka basera

keh dungi alvida... apne pariwaar ko
saheliyon ko, mere bachpan ko, uss ghar ko
jisme aapse pehli baar milne ki yaadein basi hai,
unn sare logon ko jo saath chale hai ab tak

chal padna hai ek nayi jagah, ek naye desh,
ek naya naam, naye dost aur naya nazariya
bas aap saath ho yehi hai apnapan
baki sab ko peeche chhod bharosa kiya hai aap par
rakhenge mujhe chit chor apni pyari bana kar..

yahi sandesha dena tha sab ko
ki aa gayi hai ab jaane ki ghadi
padh lo sab meri man ki ye kahani
lo chali mein piya man basne aapki raani...

bouquet of love #9

I am charming, bubbly & chirpy
everyone around me find me crispy
I love to make everything lively
which can bring everyone smilies..


one beautiful day i met you
met you in the gush of this materialistic world
I lost myself over you
and made you my whole world..


my heart thumped faster and made a beep
saying me that YOU are the man of my life
but you took my love as false and cheap
killed me alive even without a knife..


I know somewhere deep inside
you feel the same for me
even twice then what I mean
but your mind is stopping your heart..


I readily gave you my treasure
not with the thought to gain worldly pleasure
but to you I dedicate myself
which is as pure and sacred as pearl in a shell..


Days passed by, months passed by
but my love grew younger and younger
coz i have not fallen in love with you
but.. I have risen in love with you!!


I understood the meaning of being me
you made me think, feel and act
from you & me, it now became WE
and all this in my life had a great impact..


but when you desired of it
I lost myself..
lost my heartbreaks, lost my world,
lost every bit till eternity..


I admire you, I adore you,
I respect you, I pray you,
I worship you......


You are the sun of my life,
which can bring the real shine
bring life to my dead life
and make me perfect and fine..


I doubt.. doubt whether you'll get the essence of my love
the intimacy of which can just be felt and explained not...


I doubt.. doubt whether you'll be able to make it
make it before I end this lifeless life..


I doubt.. doubt whether i'll ever be happy and calm again
cuz without you my world comes to an end................